| | Current Music: | Rain 2 No Thunder - | | Security: | | | Time: | 05:48 am |
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| I like to pretend that the reason I've been staying up so late over the past couple of days is because I've been playing too many video games, or reading too much, or some other silly shit like that.
In truth, I've been staying up so late because nothing I do can put my mind at peace. I'm exhausted physically, and want nothing more than to sleep, but the ever-present fear and profound loneliness keeps screaming in my head, incessantly, so I stay up and try to read things and occupy my mind on happier thoughts than family (or lack thereof) and what my future holds.
I picked the worst possible time to have read Childhood's End. What a bleak book. Now I can't get it out of my head, and I need desperately to replace it with something comforting, but I can't do that. The last real comfort I had is my muse, and she never existed outside of my head, and I can't fucking take it any more. I need something tangible to ground me in reality. I need a real person or place to take comfort in knowing exists, but I'm running out of time to find a place like that, and I'm so fucked in the head it's not likely I'll be getting close to anyone emotionally any time soon. | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment   |
| | Current Music: | If I Gave You My Love - Pretty Lights | | Security: | | | Time: | 05:05 pm |
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| I think I've finally put my finger on why the term "workforce" being used outside of a statistical context bugs the hell out of me. It's dehumanizing. It implies that when you "join the workforce" you become a cog in the machine. Human capital. It de-values the individual over the nebulous whole. It, ironically, sounds more like something caricatures of communists would say, as opposed to the salt-of-the-Earth conservative types I usually see using it.
One thing is definite, it really makes it sound like the person using the term has had their spirits thoroughly crushed, and that the highest thing to aspire to is to be someone else's tool. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Rain 2 No Thunder - | | Security: | | | Time: | 04:29 pm |
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| You know, when November 2008 came and went, I really thought things were going to get better politically. We'd get back on track and make progress, and actually work on dealing with the huge looming problems that have developed over the past 30 years. And the Obama administration is doing their best. They're not perfect, and I don't always agree with what they do, but they're a net positive influence on our political situation, I think.
Unfortunately, they're nowhere near enough. The neoconservative propaganda machine has ramped things up an order of magnitude, and the neocons and corrupt Democrats in congress are doing everything they can to stymie the kind of progressive work we need so desperately.
Worst of all, however... there's a growing conservative backlash due to the propaganda and seeming ineffectualness of the Obama administration, and shit like this is becoming increasingly more common. It feels like USA is hellbent on destroying itself from the inside out, and I just don't know what I or anyone else can do about it.
This shit is beyond views and opinions. No good can come from flagrantly politicizing education. It's patently obvious that we are using up resources far more quickly than they can be replenished. We've ruined our economy by outsourcing production, and if we don't try to become producers again soon it'll be too late when we finally do.
But that's the way our society works. Don't fix it when it's wearing down and repairs would be feasible and result in a much greater lifespan, wait until it breaks, then hastily glue it back together and hope for the best.
As fucked up as the Chinese are with their censorship and human rights violations, at least they have a nearly unique capacity in humans to think ahead beyond their next paycheck. They're doing everything they can to survive and prosper in the future, while we're so fucking busy trying to make a handful of people gratuitously wealthy now that we just don't seem to see how badly we're screwing our future selves and offspring.
We need well-educated, rational, forward-thinking people to survive, not a bunch of self-absorbed fools who want to go back to a "better" time that only exists in their imagination. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Rain 2 No Thunder - | | Security: | | | Time: | 11:48 am |
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| Hey there, LiveJournal! You may suck (LiveJournal, not you, the person reading this) but at least you allow people to post more than 420 whole characters! I rarely have anything I feel worth posting on the internet nowadays, but when I do, gods dammit, I want enough fucking words to say it in my own way! Fuck Facebook and Twitter and the Bergeronization of the internet. Fuck it HARD.
That out of the way, rantity-rant I wanted to post on Facebook and can't link to from Facebook because I'm a 'tard and used my furry name for this LJ:
Fuck this economy! I got only 4 hours of sleep because I was neurotic due to worrying about trying to get into a calculus class today because they were all full before I was allowed to register. There were so many people on campus it took an hour to find a parking spot, so when I showed up for the class 15 minutes late to find a line out the door, I knew I wouldn't get in. I stuck around just in case though, and of course didn't get in. At least I know to ride my bike to school for the next couple of weeks, minimum. And there's still a *slight* chance of getting into the night calc class TTh, but I'll have to sacrifice life drawing to do it. *sigh* It's bad enough that 5/6 Calculus classes are before noon, the fact that they're nigh-impossible to get into without registration priority 1 is just icing on the failcake.
Mostly, I believe this is an issue of a really bad, but well-meaning design decision of the school. Rather than mostly building big lecture halls that can meet the demand, they built small classrooms for a more "personal" touch. FUCK THE PERSONAL TOUCH. Personal touch means fuck-all when you can't even get into the damn class! Half the class will drop by the middle of the semester anyway, so the personal touch can come in then, and no one who really wanted to be in that class gets shafted! | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
| I am *done* with Spirit Tracks. This does not mean I have beaten it by any means, just that I am sick of the frequency of bullshit and tedium in it. I'd honestly rather do the triforce search in Wind Waker again. At least I can go anywhere I want in that and not be on rails with stupid fucking demon trains that can only be disabled, not destroyed, so sometimes you have to waste 5+ minutes backing up and going around because of the fuckers!
Hell, I've been replaying FFVIII lately, and it's nowhere near as tedious or boring as Spirit Tracks.
You hear that, Nintendo? Your game is more boring than FFVIII! | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Frost Waltz (Alternate) - Kevin MacLeod | | Security: | | | Time: | 05:30 pm |
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| | Hooray! My car's transmission is in decent condition, it just needed more fluid! I got it serviced (it seemed like a good idea 'cause it's got a lot of miles on it and the filter was in crappy condition) and now it's working fine. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Pandora (for Cindy) - Cocteau Twins | | Security: | | | Time: | 04:11 pm |
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| There's probably a story in this, somewhere. Kinda wish I could hear it. (For those who don't know, I live in Santa Rosa, CA)
( Tracking info a go-go! ) | | comments: 1 comment or Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Turn Around - They Might Be Giants | | Security: | | | Time: | 11:33 pm |
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| | Woo! Went to a murrypurry furmeet, and it was pretty fun. Had some great pizza and conversations, and hung out outside and talked with a fur from Petaluma, and learned a bunch of Petaluma's history, which was pretty fascinating. | | comments: Leave a comment |
| | Current Music: | Strings - Asobi Seksu | | Security: | | | Time: | 03:09 pm |
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| | Woo, I'm 3^3 years old today, for whatever that's worth. I have no idea what to do with the rest of my day. | | comments: 3 comments or Leave a comment |
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kamdrimar's journal